Sweet Dreams

/ Ann Coleman

IMG_1065Sometimes it’s hard to be a dog.  I mean, I know I mostly live a good life:  I’ve got a nice home with  a loving human family, a big yard, and my very own basket of dog toys.  But I can’t help but noticing that at my house, there are certain glaring inequities between the lifestyles of those who walk around on two feet and those of us who walk around on four paws.

I’ve written before about the fact that humans get to use an indoor bathroom, whereas I am forced to potty outside, no matter what the weather.  It seems especially unfair when it raining or storming, since those are very scary situations and all I want to do is hide inside and hope that I live to see another day.  And don’t get me started on the perils of icy porch steps or searching in vain for a spot in the yard that isn’t covered in snow or sleet so I can finally do my business.

But the biggest discrepancy (and the one I find hardest to accept) occurs at mealtime.  My parents eat three meals a day, plus snacks.  Sometimes they eat out at restaurants, bringing home the leftovers, and other times Mom cooks.  My favorite dog bed is in the kitchen, so I’m right there while she’s cooking (or reheating) and the delicious aromas just make my mouth water!  When the meal is finally ready, I prance around the kitchen, wagging my tail and in general letting them know just how happy I’d be if they fix a plate for me, but does that ever happen?  No, it does not.

IMG_1527Mom and Dad might feast on a huge variety of meats, pastas, vegetables, fruits and breads, but do you know what I get served?  Dry dog kibble, that’s what.  Twice a day, every day.  Yes I know that there are plenty of starving dogs in the world who would happily make do with kibble, but do you have any idea how hard it is to see and smell so many tasty foods, day in and day out, and never get offered more than one tiny morsel of it?  Trust me, it’s enough to drive a dog crazy!

I’ve tried to let my parents know how I feel.  When they’re eating, I sit right next to them and stare at them imploringly, whining a little now and then to drive my point home.  All that gets me is the aforementioned tiny morsel, and that’s after they’ve cleaned their plates.  I even tried ignoring my kibble in the hopes that they’d serve me something better, but Mom just said that a hunger strike would do my waistline a world of good.  (Body shaming may be a no-no for humans, but clearly it’s still acceptable for us dogs….yet another inequity.)

Don’t get me wrong, I really love my parents.  And I know they think they’re doing the right thing by feeding me the dry dog food.  But that doesn’t stop me from hoping that they’ll eventually figure out that what I really want is to eat the same food they do, served in very generous portions.   A dog can dream…..

83 thoughts on “Sweet Dreams”

  3. Goodness. Maybe you could scoot your bottom on the ground so that your mum adds some cooked cabbage, carrot and apple, mixed in with a couple of drops of flaxseed and a spoon of peanut butter. It is yummy and you don’t have to spend much time outside at all, Finn. From Makea.

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  4. Finn, you need to visit with me (Max) to learn a few tricks. Yeah, I know that cats are supposed to be independent and aloof but, apparently you don’t know how to sit at the table, give the most impressive ‘poor me’ look you can muster and then (this always gets em) lift your left paw. Now at night when my humans are in bed I get more aggressive. If my food bowl is empty I just put my paws in it and scrape it around on the tile floor. That gets them up out of bed pronto. (they haven’t yet figured out that putting my food bowl up out of reach would solve the problem). We need to stand up for our rights, Finn….or at least sit up on hind legs.

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  7. This made me smile so big my hubs asked “what gives?” then I told him about your pitiful situation…, until I saw that last picture…., hmmmmm, it looks like you are very well loved, Finn. Plus you are the cutest boy with a perfect waistline!

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  8. Finn, I feel your pain. The world isn’t always fair, but perhaps it’s time to consider forming a union. Maybe you could organize your buddies and strike for better dining conditions (“We won’t wag!”). You have my full support. (Don’t tell mom.)

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    • Yes! That’s a great idea! I’ve had some comments from other pets on this post, and I think we could band together to get better food. “We won’t wag!” is a great slogan. (And don’t worry, I won’t tell Mom!)
      Love Finn

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  11. Dear Finn, you have poured your heart out in this post. Talking of that, I am reminded of a scary incident documented by one Mikhail Bulgakov (two-footed kind) in his book Heart of a Dog. Incidentally, the pooing business is one of the chief deterrents keeping our family from adopting one of your kind: it’s not fair for either of the species. The other is the challenges posed in travelling. I hope you appreciate life can be a serious business. All I can say then is this: enjoy your kibbles while you can.

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    • Thank you! I know that compared to many dogs, I do have it pretty good. I’m not sure I’d even mind so much if I didn’t have to see and smell all the human food I’m not allowed to eat. But I guess that would mean I also couldn’t live in the house, so maybe that’s not so bad after all… I”ll try to enjoy those kibbles Love, Finn

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  13. Dear Finn (and Ann please read this to him as I know he hasn’t fully mastered WP) I know you have smelled and tasted the food of the humans but please know that your health and welfare dictate that you not eat from their table! I can see from the photos that you are in perfect physical condition with healthy teeth and a shiny coat. I would hate to see you ruin your health with food too high in fat, calories, salt and even sugars!! Besides all that human food would have you running to the door to avoid an “accident in the house” which would be a poor way to thank your humans for all the love they give you!! Hugs, a friendly mouse

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    • That’s what Mom is always saying, too. Like today, when she accidentally knocked over a candy dish and M&M’s were scattered all over the floor. I came running in to see if I could grab some, but she put me in another room, saying I would get sick if I ate them. I like to think I could eat whatever I want and not worry about it, but maybe that’s not true. Meanwhile, I’ll just keep dreaming! Love, Finn

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  15. Dear Finn,
    Firstly you gotta tell mum that a big fat juicy lamb bone is good for your teeth. And there’ll be less vet dental bills for them down the track! 😂 You also gotta really ham up those looks, you know the ones, where your gaze drops and your mouth dribbles … hmm, on the other hand maybe not. But hey, at least your folks are home to look after you. My mum and dad took off around the country somewhere and they’re still not back. My new master Daniel’s good though. He lets me sleep wherever I want and feeds me lots of tit bits so I can’t complain too much. Hang in their buddy. Life’s pretty good.
    Love, Harry 🐶 xx

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    • Thanks, Harry! I bet she would go for that lamb bone thing, because that would save on vet bills (Dental cleanings are expensive, I hear). I’m sorry your mom and dad are gone, but it sounds as if Daniel is taking very good care of you. In fact, I wish my parents were a bit more like Daniel, so I’m going to make sure Mom sees this comment. But still, I guess we’re both lucky dogs…… Love, Finn

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  20. Ann, you did a fine job in describing your dog’s feelings. Putting oneself into the shoes of our friends and neighbours, including our pets, is the first step towards a greater understanding of the world.

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  21. Here’s a secret Finn. Sometimes humans are messy and drop some of that human food onto the floor where it gets hidden in a corner or under a cupboard or couch. Try acting like you don’t care about what they are eating and during meals check all the edges of the kitchen or under furniture for tidbits.

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    • Thanks, Miss Deb! You know, one of the reasons that the kitchen dog bed is my favorite is because sometimes Mom trips over me when she’s cooking, and then some food drops on the floor and I can grab it quickly. Unfortunately, it doesn’t happen as often now, so I’ll take your advice about looking for tidbits in the corners….. Love, Finn

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  22. Finn, you are a lucky dog…much loved, and in the end, that is the thing that really matters. Being healthy is such an important thing. As the saying goes, ‘You are what you eat!’ People have a much easier time opening up the refrigerator or the pantry whenever they want…That is where all the trouble begins! 🙂

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    • That’s what my mom says too, Miss Linda! She says it’s too easy to snack for her, and I admit I have a hard time not being jealous when she says that, because I can only snack when someone gives me a treat. But I guess it is healthier this way. And I do like being healthy! Love, Finn

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  23. I just love these creative posts that are written from Finn’s perspective. I have a smile on my face and chuckles in my mind. It takes a special writer to be able to see her fur baby’s point of view!

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  24. Aw, Finn, you get a bed in the kitchen?? Wow, I Monkey would LOVE that! My mama is afraid she’ll spill something hot on me so she has my bed elsewhere. I can still smell the yummies though! And she adds canned pumpkin and green beans to my kibble, which makes it a whole lot tastier. Just the other day, she was bemoaning the fact that she hadn’t trained me to use the human toilet, rather than sending me outside in the ice and snow. Hmm, maybe if we doggins put our heads together, we can figure out a way to market that kind of product. You and I can be the test canaries!!

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    • Mom and Dad moved one of my beds into the kitchen one night when it was storming and I was scared, and they could see that I was “hiding out” there. And after that, I made it very plain that I liked it there! (It’s not in the path that mom walks between the stove, fridge and sink, so I think I’m safe.) But I love your idea of pumpkin and green beans in my food, thank you. As for indoor dog toilets, I KNOW my mom is in favor of those….she just doesn’t know how to make one. But I have heard her saying many times, usually as she’s heading down to walk shelter dogs in super cold or hot weather, that what the world needs is indoor dog toilets! Maybe you and I, Monkey, really could be the test canaries. I like the way you think!!!! Love, Finn

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    • That’s good advice, Miss Jo, and I promise I’ll try. Funny how when I was living in a shelter I thought all I needed to be happy was a real home. Now that I have one, I also want people food. I guess people aren’t the only ones who are never satisfied!

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  37. I hear ya! What drives me nuts is when my folks come home with a box of chicken in a bucket. I will sit by my dad and watch him eat the very juicy chicken leg, and yet, doesn’t eat the bone. What’s the deal with that??? Love, Shorty

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    • My parents do the same thing, Shorty! They never eat the bones (and they don’t offer them to me either). Talk about a waste of perfectly good food! We love our humans, but sometimes they can be hard to understand. Love, Finn

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